urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:mtchymee Jaymeee Jaymeee 2005-10-23T23:04:18Z urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:mtchymee:39556 2005-10-23T23:04:18Z 2005-10-23T23:04:18Z So its been like more then a year since i wrote in here. But im bored and freezing (because my mom won't turn on the heat this winter) so i decided to update my livejournal. Not a lots happened since then... <br />i was going to go to mka...ended up not going, mad long story... I wish i had gone. I'm actually doing well my Junior year but its the social part thats bothering me... So for an entire year of not saying anything i surprisingly don't know what to talk about... i guess ill finish my thoughts later. urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:mtchymee:39323 2005-01-23T15:52:16Z 2005-01-23T15:52:16Z O man. This weekend is so stressful cause instead of getting all of your work done and having nothing left. No matter how much i study, their is always more to study. Its like a horrible pattern. I studied all friday night! Then yesterday morning i was studying english and jon called but i was getting so mad at the phone ringing that i picked up and screamed HELLO!, and thats when i knew i needed to take a break. it sucked. But i got out on saturday night even in the foot of snow. I was at Mikes with Peter and Julian and they were playing DDR for mad long. It made me feel inferior about my dancing skills ( jk lol but i do suck at that game). Then me and Julian had to walk home so mike and peter came with. It was so cold! i walked home backwards cause the snow was hitting my face. Anyhow then i got home and was kinda mad for a little. But then i watched Alias till three in the morning and fell asleep on my chair. Now im procrastinating studying chem.<br />-----------------------------------------------<br />If anyone wants to help me study chem it would be greatly appreciated.<br />----------------------------------------------- urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:mtchymee:39042 2005-01-17T20:23:05Z 2005-01-17T20:23:05Z <p><font color="#ff0000">Its my Birthday! Im 16!</font> I actually had a pretty bad birthday weekend if i actually think about it lol, but i dont even really mind which is the wierd part. This weekend was extremly relaxing. On friday i went to battle of the bands with genna adames and mike. The bands i saw were o.k. but my car ride home was extremely tramatizing. Then on saturday night i went to the city with my mom ady gen and cari which was fun we got dinner and had dessert and walked around. Our waiter was really funny and kinda hot. Then Sunday about 45 people were at my house for my grandpa and my birthday celebration.&nbsp;Today my dad took me out to lunch and tonight im opening gifts. All and all everything was o.k. nothing exceptional but who knows maybe it will get amazing as the day goes on. </p> <p>-------------------------------------------------------------</p> <p>I feel kinda old and how in another 16 years im gonna be 32 and that freaked me out cause i cant even imagine myself in my 30's. Also i watched <u>A Home At The End Of The World </u>which made me cry lol but it was good. </p> <p>----------------------------------------------------------------------------</p> <p>O.k. now heres the part were i talk about when i was 15. When i turned 15 i dont think i could have ever imagined the things i would do.All the new people i met or became closer with I still hang out with even a year later. I was a lifeguard this year over the summer. I played Varsity softball. I successfully quite two highschool sports. My many extra extra curricular activities became like an entire part of my life that i never would have even expected and dont really like when i think about it. I hated all my friends im sure at one point or another, and i bet they hated me. I bought plane tickets , i plotted running away from home like every other week. And i messed up something that i truly cared about which made my self image go from bad to worse. So on the peak of my 16th birthday all i really have are a bunch of things to remind myself not to do, and a bunch of things im gonna feel bad about doing, and a buncha people im gonna love doing them with lol. Happy Birthday Me!</p> urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:mtchymee:38731 2005-01-13T23:25:19Z 2005-01-13T23:25:19Z So today was one of those days where i wanted to be as far away from school as possible. Last night i did like half of every assignment so i was beat for today and was stressing about the take home test ( that i didnt finish), the lab ( that i didnt finish) and all this other hw. Also i woke up at like 7:30 and had to rush around the house and that is the ONE thing that is a guarantee to ruin my day no matter what. So it started off all bad etc. Then during lunch after i finished my test and was walking to the caf i realized that their was no way i could stay the rest of the day, so i left lunch early after i walked in (&out of everyone sitting down no one even looked up)... so i gave my test to jon to hand in and walked home. The rest of the day was ok i watched this wierd 80's movie and their was like a dance battle in this guys living room, it was so strange!, it was a movie genna would enjoy thats what i kept thinking while i was watching it. Anyhow then i got a haircut!, that I LOVE!!!! cept i dont think anyone else will like it, but whatevs cause i do. holler. Tonights the OC, but i have to babysit so i hope the kids go to bed so i can watch it or im going home and leaving thier asses there :) urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:mtchymee:38615 2005-01-11T20:01:33Z 2005-01-11T20:01:33Z ok i have to get all of my work done cause im trying to finish everything so i can dedicate my entire night to studying the vocab part of the english test ( the part i normally do bad on, but last test i did good on, and i think he thinks its shady, so i have to do well on this one so he doesnt think i cheated on the last one, even though i didnt, i just studied hard... like im going to do right now).THANK GOD FOR CAROLINE! i forgot my book and then i went home cause i forgot my gym clothes so i didnt go to gym 8th period. Anyhow caroline rescued me cause when i called her she got the book from my locker and im gonna pick it up from her house later.GRACIAS!:D<br />---------------------------------------------------<br />Im freaking out!, im so stressed everytime i hear someone go upstairs i have like a panic attack... oh mannnnn tomorrow cant come any sooner!........okokokokokok<br />----------------------------------------<br />things i need to do today..<br />1. hitting tonight<br />2. laundry<br />3. pack all my stuff for tomorrow without forgetting my snorkling goggles for genna to use during the lab tomorrow.<br />4. dont forget anything important!!<br />5. do all my hw<br />6. study english/pick up my book at carolines<br /><br />those things are soooo not difficult im just having a fout so ignore this part.<br />---------------------------------------------<br />ok so i havent eaten anything the past two days besides a glass of orange juice, and an apple each morning. Idk whats wrong, im just not hungry. im gonna force feed myself dinner tonight so i dont like pass out. thatd be bad.<br />----------------------------------------------<br />Finally... Despite my yellingness today at lunch, i do appreciate when friends worry about me and i didnt mean it when i said u acted like my dad cause that was mean and u are way cooler then my dad will ever be and i dont want u to be dissapointed in me and i want u to know that i have everything under control and u dont need to worry and if i didnt my friends would be the first people i would come to (cause im not one to really hide much lol). So in closing dont get upset with me so much cause i dont want to dissapoint u anymore, i just want to let u know that im fine, and will always be fine and if im ever not, you;ll be the first person i go to cause i know i can trust u.<br /><br />p.s. ill bring your shirt in tomorrow lol;D urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:mtchymee:38324 2005-01-11T12:00:35Z 2005-01-11T12:00:35Z AM UPDATE! holler for writing at a quarter to 7 whilst blow drying my hair. (how,u ask?....because im a beast and type with one hand). Anyhow i wouldnt be up this early if my mom EVER took me to get my hair cut. As of now even when i do blow dry it if just end up looking like a drugged out hippie cause its so long and plain, and because of this i was forced to stop throwing up peace signs because people were actually confusing me with being a hippie lovin flower child peace keeper of the world!( yeah completly made that all up, but i really do need a hair cut :D)<br />-------------------------------<br />Im still sore from hitting last night cause i had to miss two lessons in a row so thats a whole two weeks with out swinging like 5 bajillion times a night. Anyhow now i have a blister on my thumb even though i wore batting gloves which is beat as hell...Softball is stressing me out. Only a couple weeks till florida!, i need to throw more im flippin out and i dont think im gonna get playing time but i really really want to and ahh!. Also the coach posts these things in the locker room like " 7 weeks till softball" that i have to look at everytime i go to the locker room to change ( which is like almost every day now cause ive started going to gym cause Coach J i think got offended lol) the best part is underneath the "_# weeks till softball" is a checklist of " things we should be doing". Consisting of like hitting( done) bunting( done) running ( sorda done) , throwing (done), and crunches ( wtf!). Anyhow along with that freaking me out i end up getting offers to go to the cages like EVERYDAY. so my life is constantly in softball mode even like 2 months before the season. Bleh, i just hope i have fun, but i know i will cause i love the girls on the team and everything will work out eventually. Ook so thats my rant about mhs softball and now i needa go get dressed because if im late for school my first period teacher ( who hates me with the fires of hell) will kill me lol. ciao! urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:mtchymee:38137 2005-01-08T20:41:04Z 2005-01-08T20:41:04Z O-M-G. First and formost rain should never occur on Saturdays, because their is something about rain that causes people to have mental breakdown which dramaticly effects their making plan abilities. Why the rain stop people from wanting to do something is beyond me, but frankly thier is no point to be sitting around on a SATURDAY AFTERNOON, just because its raining...honestly is to cliche. <br />-------------------------------------------------<br /><br />Recently the only thing people have talked about is how "boring" everything is and how everything is so "repetetive" and blah blah blah blah. I feel this way to so its not like im flustered at the people saying it. But really, WE LIVE IN SUBURBIA! It is ALWAYS going to be BORING. the only thing to do is ALWAYS going to be something illegal. And it ALWAYS will eventually get old. Their is nothing you can do about it except pick up and leave. Im not saying leave forever, or even for a year, a couple of months even a couple of weeks would be good. As soon as i turn 16 you can kiss my ass goodbye. Im buying a bus ticket and going to who knows where with who knows who. All i know is im getting the fuck out of here cause thier are so many people that i dont need to be with. Thier are SOOO many people that i wish would move so i wouldnt have to be bothered by the thought of what their doing. I just want to be able to start new, with just myself. Yes, leaving people is hard but i honestly hate it here and find myself hating new things everyday. Im not bored. Im really fine. i just cant stand doing this over and over again. Things need to change or i need to leave. and frankly leaving would be alot easier for the people im talking about. urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:mtchymee:37864 2005-01-06T21:09:59Z 2005-01-06T21:09:59Z Well through the motivation of Mike i finally deleated all of my entries and now am starting all over. Its sophmore year and frankly i have nothing better to do then write in this so that is what ive decided to do. My other things will be more interesting but today im to tired from clicking so god damn much.